Archive for July, 2010

Campeones, campeones, oe, oe, oe!

July 13th, 2010

Campeones, campeones, oe, oe, oe! Or as my new Scottish friend Philip McCuppal (I think that is what he said his name was?) who I have just met says, oh aye, oh aye, oh aye! We are in Sun City celebrating the greatest triumph in the history of Spanish sport, and there have been of few of those, for sure. But surely this is the best ever, the crisis is over and Spain is on the road to recovery, peace has broken out throughout the world, all diseases have been eradicated and the Martians have landed and they are all two metre tall blonde women with big boobies dying for sex with Earthlings (actually I made that last bit up)! But let me talk you through it, I know you have all seen it seventeen times on the tele and you are already fed up of it, but just let me tell you one more time, and then I’ll go away, honest! More »

A star on our shirt at last?

July 11th, 2010

We have just found out that we will have a star on our shirts if we win the World Cup! Michael Caine is famous for saying “not a lot of people know that!”, and we are sure that not a lot of people know this either! But in today’s Marca newspaper in Spain they have published pictures of the shirts, and it’s true! Brazil have five stars, Germany three, England one etc., etc. And if we beat Holland today, we will have our first. Another reason that we have to win today! More »

How do we get tickets for the final?

July 10th, 2010

How do you get a ticket for a World Cup final? The king of Spain has no problems, he just rings up Mr. Blatter and he gets a ring-side seat, but we don’t have Mr. Blatter’s mobile phone number. Goran tried taking all his clothes off outside of the Spanish team’s headquarters like that Paraguayan model Larissa Riquelme, but that just cost him a night in a Joberg cell and a restraining order not to go near the team anymore (he also got a couple of strange phone calls from South East Asian businessmen, but we won’t go in to that!). More »

Living the dream?

July 9th, 2010

We have to say that we are all walking about in a bit of a trance at the moment. Have Spain really made it to the World Cup final, or is this just a dream? True, Spain has many World champions in other sports, basketball, cycling, Rafa Nadal winning Wimbledon twice, we have won many youth international tournaments in football, and we are the reigning European champions at senior level after beating Germany two years ago. But this is the World Cup, and in all our other participations we have never made it past the quarter finals. More »

The octopus got it right!

July 7th, 2010

Si, si, si, the octopus got it right again! The famous German cephalopod “Paul” was risking being “pulpo con patatas” after predicting that Spain would win the semi-finals against his own team, but he chose the right box once again! And we are going to play the World Cup final!

What a night! On the anniversary of San Fermín, the seventh day of the seventh month and the start of the “encierros” in Pamplona, the Spanish “mozos” give the run-around to the “toros” of Germany! We all think Torres might not start, but nobody (except maybe Paul?) expects Pedro to be in the starting line-up. But once again Don Vicente gets it right, and with seven from Barça, three from Real Madrid and Capdevilla we win for the third game in a row by one to zero! More »

Good job we brought lots of underpants!

July 4th, 2010

After watching the exciting match between Uruguay and Ghana, Goran and I decided to take a few spare pairs of underpants to our quarter final with Paraguay. And what a good job we did! The match had everything, disallowed goals, penalty saves, posts, and a late goal from who else but Sir David Villa to take us in to the semi-finals of the World Cup for the first time ever! We did have some problems with the security check at Ellis Park though. “Show me what you have in the bag please gentlemen”. “Are you really sure?”. “Yes, open it up please…. phwor, what’s that?”. Goran admits he hadn’t had time to use the hotel laundry as he has just got back from Cape Town. “Close the bag, quickly please, and get out of my sight!”. He is talking in to his radio though as we go through, and there are a couple of men in dark glasses standing near to us throughout the game! More »

So no Brazil / Spain final this summer!

July 3rd, 2010

Today is quarter final day for Spain, and we read in the press that our opponents Paraguay are going all out to intimidate us. What does that mean, they’re going to try and kick us out of the game, with nine men in defence like Switzerland? It is a worry, as everybody knows that is the only way they can beat us, but surely we are better than that and can find a way to stick a goal or two past them? Paraguay shouldn’t be a threat to our defence, their two star players are Roqué Santa Cruz (is he still at Blackburn?) and Lucas Barrios of Borussia Dortmund. Barrios only became Paraguayan three months ago, and was Argentinian before that, and even his mother (who is Paraguayan herself) didn’t know that her son had changed his nationality! Still, being a centre forward for Paraguay is dangerous, their last striker Salvador Cabañas is still recovering after being shot in the head in a night club in Mexico City! More »

We visit Stellenbosch – I think!

July 2nd, 2010

Oh my head, oh my head, oh my head! What time is it? What day is it? What planet are we on? I look at my watch, it is Thursday! What happened to Wednesday? We have to leave for the airport in twenty minutes! A light is flashing in our room. It is one of those traffic bollards! Where did that come from? Four legs are sticking out of Goran’s bed, I hope it’s not the goat, but no, it is Goran and his new Brazilian girlfriend Marcia Larts. The last 24 hours are a bit hazy, for sure. We take the tour bus to the Stellenbosch wine growing region, but Goran disappears in the direction of the toilets in the second stop-over at a vineyard in Franschhoek, and the bus driver gets fed up waiting for us and leaves. It’s not a problem though as we meet some German football fans who are here early for the game against Argentina, and we join them on their tour instead, which is certainly more fun. More »